Things That Trigger Me (Well, Tech Related)

After I left my last company, one of my teammates shared with me a list of things she had been keeping about me in the Notes app in her phone called “Things that trigger Doug”. It must say something about me that someone would keep such a list. Anyway it made me laugh! You’ll only appreciate this if you work in tech. I give it to you unedited:

• Writing shitty code the first time with the excuse of “trying to get it to work” / hard coding shit to make it work
• White IDE theme
• Stealing his phone
• Waiting in a line for 2 hours
• When you don’t believe in containers
• Windows 7 in 2019
• Using private chats instead of public Slack channels
• Agile words
• People who wait to write their Dockerfile until the last minute /don’t dev in a docker container
• People cheating in the step challenge when he runs 14–16 miles a day
• Designated CAB meetings /calling releases “emergency” or “off cycle”
• Notepad++
• QA tester boxes / manual testing
• Ad blocker. Support the creators!
• Naming things poorly
• End to end tests
• People calling stuff a blocker when they aren’t blocked by shit
• Iframes
• Wasting money in the name of frugality
• Putty
• Putting “Personal Interests” on your resume